Today for the blogging101, I am to write for a specific person. Since I am writing for Vi to read, my posts are almost always addressed to him. This is also addressed to him but it’s about my father and things that I have learned from him and would maybe like to see in Vi someday.
Your ammachan, my achan – sometimes I feel they are two different people all together. When I was little, dad was just the strict parent. But as I became a wife, a mother; I started to see him in a different light. Yes, he has his faults and setbacks but this is not about those things. This is more about the lessons he has taught me without even saying a word. It has always been his actions that have been a great influence.
1. Giving back to society – We were a middle class family while amma was growing up. Meaning that we had just enough to be happy. No indulgences were part of our daily life. The cinema, an outing to the restaurant were all very much valued since it was not a common thing. We were a family of 5 and we were very happy with what we had. My father had two dibbas (makeshift piggy banks usually made from empty tang containers in which he had made a hole). One was for the temple and another for anyone who might need financial help. He would deposit money in that regularly, like every month when he gets his salary. He believed in giving back to society and did what he could at that time. Anyone who asked him for help was mostly never disappointed. If he could help, he would do it. We never knew of this as kids because he never publicised what he used to do. But slowly when I come to know more about him, I feel proud. I feel God has showered me with all these blessings in life because of all the good things that my parents have done.
2. Taking care of your body – be it exercise, grooming yourself , being neat and tidy always, he does that. He would exercise every morning. Still does..hehehe. Take bath early in the morning. Maintain high levels of hygiene. He does all of this today also. He was one of the very few men that I have seen with clean toenails. He even puts mine to shame ;). He was diagnosed with diabetes a long long time ago, but till date he had not had to take insulin injections. He has always managed to keep his blood sugar levels in control by exercise and food control.
3. Help others even if they don’t help you – That is a very difficult one to follow. Who wants to help people who never help you or rather even people who talk bad about you. My father, that’s who. He will forget what who said when about him, if they need some help. In any form. He is ready to be there for them.
4. Family comes first – He has always taken care of his family. By family, I don’t mean just me, maamen, mema and ammamma. I mean his brothers and sisters. His parents. He has always been the support for them right from the time he started working. He never shied away from his responsibilities when he got married. He is one of the most responsible men, I know, in this world.
This is how I know my achan, and these are some things I would like you to imbibe. He has so much of love for all 3 of us, me, ur maamen and mema, but we or rather I never realised it because he doesn’t express it in the conventional manner. When I was going through a difficult time in life, I remember him showing me this brochure of mothercare. It was like more than 20 years old. In those times, mothercare was not available in the Gulf. It had its headquarters in England and if you wanted a dress, you order it via post. Snail mail as it is called now. Then they would courrier it to your address. He showed me the book and the dress that he had ordered for me when I was less than a year old. I was truly overwhelmed at the time because in my mind, at that particular time, I thought my parents don’t love me or care for me. The important thing for me was not the fact that he had ordered a dress for me but the fact that he had saved that book for over 20 years. To keep alive those memories. That did make me feel emotional then and does now too. Anyways, I realised that some people just don’t know how to express their love. But they do love you nonetheless.
But Amma keeps forgetting that :p.
Love u Vi.